It is not very often that something good arrives as a forwarded email. This one really made my day.

True Friendship

Are you tired of those sissy-ass “friendship” poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality? Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship:

  1. When you are sad – I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.

  2. When you are blue – I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.

  3. When you smile – I will know you finally got laid.

  4. When you are scared – I will rag on you about it every chance I get.

  5. When you are worried – I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining.

  6. When you are confused – I will use little words.

  7. When you are sick – Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don’t want whatever you have.

  8. When you fall - I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.

Remember……A good friend will help you move…..a REALLY good friend will help you move a body…….let me know if you ever need me to bring a shovel.

Friendship is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth.